The Queen of England was visiting one of Australia's top hospitals, and during her tour of the floors she passed a room where a male patient was masturbating. "Oh my God", said the Queen, "that's disgraceful, what is the meaning of this?" The doctor leading the tour explains, "I am sorry your ladyship, this man has a very serious condition where the testicles rapidly fill with semen. If he doesn't do that 5 times a day, they'll explode, and he would die instantly.

" "Oh, I am sorry", said the Queen. On the next floor they passed a room where a young nurse was giving a patient a b**w ***.

"Oh my God", said the Queen, "What's happening there?" The Doctor replied, "Same problem, better health cover."