THE CURSE An old man goes to the Wizard to ask him if he can remove a "Curse" he has been living with for the last 40 years.

The Wizard says: "Maybe, but you will have to tell me the exact words that were used to put the curse on you." The old man says without hesitation: "I now pronounce you man and wife." DEATH BED WISH John was on his deathbed and gasped pitifully.

"Give me one last request, Dear, " he said. "Of course, John, " his wife said softly. "Six months after I die, " he said, "I want you to marry Bob." "But I thought you hated Bob, " she said. With his last breath John said, "I do!" THE PICKUP A man picks up a young woman in a bar and convinces her to come back to his hotel. When they are relaxing afterwards, he asks, "Am I the first man you ever made love to?" She looks at him thoughtfully for a second before replying. "You might be, " she says. "Your face looks familiar." THE RABBIS ADVICE A man goes to see the Rabbi.

Rabbi, something terrible is happening and I have to talk to you about it.

" The Rabbi asked: "What's wrong?" The man replied: "My wife is poisoning me." The Rabbi, very surprised by this, asks: "How can that be?" The man then pleads: "I'm telling you, I'm certain she's poisoning me, what should I do?" The Rabbi then offers: "Tell you what, Let me talk to her, I'll see what I can find out and I'll let you know.

" A week later the Rabbi calls the man and says: "Well, I spoke to your wife. I spoke to her on the phone for three hours. You want my advice?" The man said yes and the Rabbi replied: "Take the poison